I swear...this is the last time!

Everyone has fallen victim to it at one time or another; yet the culprit is unique for each.

Victim: The Dieter

Culprit: The Cookie

"I'll start my diet tomorrow. Today is my last day to indulge myself before the self-restriction and deprivation begins. I'll be working it out and sweating it off tomorrow so one last cookie, or dozen won't kill me. "

And when tomorrow rises and the day begins...

"Today is an absolutely horrible day. My boss is stressing me out, my man is acting up, and I had a huge falling out with my girlfriend. After a day like today, I deserve to eat what will comfort me. After all, it's only one more day. I'll start tomorrow."

And so the cycle continues..."I swear today is the last time (day) before I start my diet and begin my bodily transformation."

The Victim: Mrs. Naive

The Culprit: Mr. "Good-for-Nothing"

The Mrs., "We've had this conversation at least ten times before. You say you are going to the store and you stay out all night and don't come home until the following afternoon. No phone call, no answer, and then you come home smelling like perfume. That's it. I'm done spending countless sleepless nights at home waiting for you. Get your things and get out!"

The Mr., "But baby, I told you, I stopped by my boys and fell asleep on the couch. And you know his girl is always at his place. That's the smell of her perfume from her always sitting on the couch."

Less than a week later....

The Mr. (with flowers and teddy bear in hand), "Baby, I miss you not being in my life. You complete me. I love you and want to spend my life with you. I will prove it to you. Please, baby, just give me a chance."

The Mrs., "I love you too baby but I can't keep doing this. This is your last chance to change."

And so the cycle continues..."I swear this is the last time that I'm taking you back. If you mess up again that's it...we are done for good...no more chances after this."

The Victim: The "I'm starting-school-next-semester student"

The Culprit: Any other source of immediate income

"I swear I'm going back to college next semester. I had to take the semester off so I could work. My car broke down and I had to get it fixed because a face like this can't take public transportation."

And when the new semester is on the horizon...

"I got my car fixed but I really need to save money to go back to school. One more semester working and I'll have enough money saved up to finish school and live off of without having to work full-time."

And when a full year has gone by and another new semester is on the horizon...

"I was having issues with my car so I decided to sell it and get something new. I used all my school savings to buy the newest, coolest, chick magnet on wheels."

And so the cycle continues...